Basic Counseling Skills
  • Home
  • A. TECHNIQUES
  • Pattern of Sessions
  • Active Listening
  • Body Language
  • Asking Questions
  • Paraphrasing/Tone
  • Summary
  • Note Taking
  • Homework
  • Goodie Bag/Fun Stuff
  • Technique References
  • B. THEORIES
  • Client Centered
  • Holistic/Biopsychosocial
  • Strengths Based
  • Cognitive/Behavioral
  • Solution Focused
  • Existential Therapy
  • Letting Go
  • Theory References
  • C. SAMPLE SESSIONS
  • 1. Client Centered Counseling
  • 2.&3. No Show/Cancellation
  • 4. Strengths Based
  • 5. Cognitive Beh. Counseling
  • 6. Holistic Health Counseling
  • 7. Solution Focused
  • 8. Existential Counseling
  • 9. Becoming Unnecessary
  • D. SELF HELP
  • Journaling
  • Mood Mapping
  • Whole Health Check In
  • Community Resources
  • Ten Things I Like About Me
  • Common Lies We Tell
  • Goal-Setting
  • A Why to Bear a How
  • Happy People
  • Self-Help References
  • E. CONTINUING EDUCATION
  • F. SITE MAP
  • G. CONTACT ME!
  • H. READERS' CONTRIBUTIONS
    • Addiction and Sleep - Jessica S
    • Alcohol Counseling - Carol G.
    • Depression and Addiction Rehab - Katherine C
    • Quit Smoking and Alcohol Rehab
    • Reducing Stigma - Patricia S.
    • Suicidal Thoughts and Alcohol Abuse - Julia W
    • Recovery Village - William B.
    • Bereavement Counseling - Sally W
    • Personality Traits - Sally W
    • 3 Solutions to Worst Fears - Paige M
    • 30 Min Reduce Anxiety - Paige M
    • Restorative Power of Arts & Crafts - Sally W
    • 3 Ways - Rid of Sunday Scaries
    • Conquer Fear of Flying - Sally W.
    • Document Anxiety through Journaling - Sally W
    • Career Options - Sally W
    • School Counselor ToolKit - Serena K.
    • Psychology Degrees - Lindsay F
    • Depression and Addiction Rehab - Katherine C
    • Diagnosing Depression - Melissa M
    • PostPartum Depression - Tracey F
    • Assisted Living Options for People with Disabilities
    • Wheelchair Home Safety - Michael M
    • Cerebral Palsy Resources
    • Counseling and Persistent Pain - Sally W
    • Mesothelioma Guide - Corine F.
    • Mesothelioma Resources
    • Finding Start Up Success - Eva B
    • Cleaning House for Better Health - Cheryl C.
    • Destress/Clean Home - Cheryl C
    • Financial Stress - Sally W.
    • Financial Debt - Sally W
    • Be Happy - Hazel G.
    • Gut Health & Mental Health - Sally W
    • How Having a Skincare Routine
    • Counseling the Impoverished - Sally W
    • Conquering Interviews - Eva B
    • Daily Journal Routine - Paige M
    • 4 Journaling Tips for Beginners - Shristi Patni
    • Drug Dangers - Rebecca P.
    • Recall Report - Laura P.
    • Living Mindfully - Mollie Wilson
    • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - Sally W.
    • Couns. Resources - Tim C.
    • Practical Financial SKills - Johanne H
    • Nutrition to Help Anxiety - Sally W
    • Retirement Career Change - Sally W
    • Managing Phobias - Sally W
    • Healing Power of Pets - Sally W
    • Geriatric Counseling - Sally W
    • Counseling Seniors with Anxiety - Sally W
    • Senior Resources - Claire S.
    • Addiction and Sleep - Jessica S
    • Better Sleep - Better Health - Cheryl C
    • Treating Insomnia - Sally W
    • Tuck Sleep - Kellen S
    • De-Fogging Brain - Sally W
    • Recovery from Sports Injury
    • Improving Mental Clarity - Sally W
    • Indoor Air Quality Can Affect Mental Health - Sally W
    • Stress on Health - Sally W.
    • Stress Management - Sally W
    • Suicidal Thoughts and Alcohol Abuse - Julia W
    • Summer Side Gigs for Teachers - Joyce W
    • Tobacco in 2017 - Mary G.
    • Take Control of Your Life - Dorothy Watson
    • No More Winter Blues - Rufus Carter
    • How I Put Anxiety Attacks on Pause
    • 8 Effective Tips for Improving Mental Health - Camille Johnson
    • Manage And Reduce Stress For Your Employees With These Tips - Rufus Carters
    • Moving Forward When Grief Intrudes in Your Life - Camille J
    • Working Remotely - Emma Grace Brown
    • Unlock Greater Confidence - Rufus Carter
    • Coping With a Mid-Life Crisis - Rufus Carter
    • 6 Self-Care Tips - Laurie Abner
    • Help a Loved One After the Loss of a Spouse - Rufus CarterNew Page
    • Relocating After a Tragic Loss - Lucille Rosetti
    • Guidelines for Teens Who Want to Thrive as Entrepreneurs - Lucille Rosetti
    • 5 Common Lifestyle Habits That Can Cause Skin Damage - Andrew Mark

Step One - Learning the Basic Skills of Counseling Techniques

Learning some basic skills of counseling techniques (link to Basic Counseling Techniques: A Beginning Therapist's Tool Kit by Wayne Perry) is the first step on our journey.

These basic skills include the patterns of sessions, active listening, body language, tone, open ended and closed questions, paraphrasing, summarizing, note taking, homework, the 'goodie bag' and other fun and informative stuff!

You will also have an opportunity to "listen in" on a number of sample sessions to see how all of these counseling skills work together.

Note: I use the words "counselor" and "listener" interchangeably; also "client" and "speaker."

What follows are some simple descriptions. For more information and practice ideas, click on the appropriate buttons on the left hand site.


The pictures on the right hand side of this section's pages serve as topic illustrations.

The large pics at the bottom will always have a cat. Why? Because Sigmund Freud - physiologist, medical doctor, psychologist and father of psychoanalysis, and who is generally recognized as one of the most influential and authoritative thinkers of the twentieth century - loved cats!


Introduction to Terms

The pattern of sessions has a predictable rhythm with an introduction, information gathering, discussion and a conclusion.

Active listening happens when you "listen for meaning". The listener says very little but conveys much interest. The listener only speaks to find out if a statement (or two or twenty) has been correctly heard and understood.

Body language takes into account our facial expressions, angle of our body, proximity of ourself to another, placement of arms and legs, and so much more. Notice how much can be expressed by raising and lowering your eyebrows!

You need to monitor the tone of your voice - in the same way that you monitor your body language. Remember, the person may not remember what was said, but they will remember how you made them feel!
An open question is one that is used in order to gathering lots of information – you ask it with the intent of getting a long answer. A closed question is one used to gather specific information - it can normally be answered with either a single word or a short phrase. Good counseling techniques to know!

Paraphrasing is when you restate what the speaker said. Often different words are used and the listener may be using this to draw attention to a particular concern or aspect. Sometimes paraphrasing is used to clarify.

Summarizing is focusing on the main points of a presentation or conversation in order to highlight them. At the same time you are giving the “gist”, you are checking to see if you are accurate.
Baby steps
Notetaking is the practice of writing down pieces of information, often in an shorthand and messy manner. The listener needs to be discreet and not disturb the flow of thought, speech or body language of the speaker.

Homework? Absolutely! When the person identifies a need or concern, she or he must be willing to work hard at addressing it. This is much like what you are doing right now. You want to learn counseling techniques, so you are going to study and practice these basic skills!

The Goodie Bag and Other Fun and Informative Stuff help make a counseling session an occasion for joy, as well as for additional learning.


Putting It All Together

Once you have reviewed Counseling Techniques I encourage you to "listen in" on Sample Sessions One and Four - to see how these could be used in an initial and subsequent visit.

One - Client Centered (Carl Rogers)

Four - Strength Based (Positive Thinking / Learned Optimism)

After reviewing Counseling Techniques and Sample Sessions One and Four, it will be time to study common Counseling Theories.

It will truly be "very interesting!" (A Freud quote.)


Time spent with cats is never wasted. - Sigmund Freud
Sassy Lara
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